Jan
18

Be The First To Know That You Are Unique

you are unique

“The person you see is the person you will be.”

- Jim Cathcart

A few days ago, my brother and I were just chatting about how we missed those days when we were young with no responsibilities. We had nothing to worry about and had lots of childhood friends to play with. It was then that our family doctor came to my mind.

His family were close friends with ours and there was a name my dad always called him which was peculiar to him alone. Whenever they meet or speak over the phone, he’d say “nobody like you”. I never really knew why he gave our doctor that name, but I always wondered what it meant.

It was only recently that I got to realize that it was only that doctor that really understood my family’s medical needs and issues. There was truly nobody like him.

There is nobody like YOU!

It’s a normal occurrence for us as humans to always try to imitate others in one way or the other. This is not a bad thing. Sometimes it actually help us to develop, especially if what we’re imitating is good. The only bad thing here is in making it a life long dream. We pick someone we admire and then “copy cat” their whole lifestyle until our own lives become a complete duplicate. You could just copy their bad attitudes too.

Sometimes the only way to develop ourselves is to pick a mentor, view their qualities and make them our own. But never make the mistake of imitating both their qualities and personalities. Just because your mentor, who has the quality of generosity is a Choleric doesn’t mean you too should become a Choleric. Your personality is what makes you unique and different from your friends, mentors and others.

The simple way people genuinely flatter you is to tell you that you have something which you never knew you had. If you have experience in being flattered like I do due to maybe inferiority complex, you’ll know that some lead to manipulation, making you do things you didn’t want to do. Why wait for someone else to tell you who you are when you can equally and easily find out yourself. This still boils down to self examination.
When you adopt qualities, give them your personal twist, making them fit with the kind of person you are.

Look at yourself as a brand, a new product which the world has never seen before. The time will come when it is not what you have that will be your criteria for uniqueness. It will be how well you have developed yourself that will make you indispensable, invaluable and irreplaceable.

 

I have seen myself become a “copy-cat” many times, have you?  How else do you feel one can have that feeling of uniqueness? I’d love to hear your views in the comments.

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Comments

  1. Hi Lanre: Congrats on your new blogging platform. I’ve added it to the blogroll on my writer’s blog.

    I’m really lucky in that my father brought me up (my mother died when I was young) to believe that I could do ANYTHING. I really thank him for that. It helped me be confident, and really believe the world was and is mine.

    We are indeed all unique. The key is to believe that our uniqueness makes us special and that people will gravitate to that specialness.

    • Thanks, upgrading to my domain name was a big step.
      Not everyone has the mindset you had while you were young and that’s a good thing. We can all learn from you.
      Thanks for your comment.

  2. Great read Lanre. I agree.
    So often, I would hear people use the word “intimidating” to describe me and it used to frustrate me. Until I realize that “intimidating” is a word used by the insecure. I made a decision not allow my unique expression of confidence to be maligned by someone else’s insecurity. I am uniquely me. :-)

  3. I love the article. It’s true: be an original. But it also made me wonder, what if being yourself is standing in the way of your progress e.g. shyness, overconfidence or being too blunt?

    • That’s a really good question. You’d realize that people who examine themselves are those who want to develop positive attitudes. Being overconfident and blunt are negative attitudes that could hinder development. This is where mentorship comes in. As I said in the post, you pick a mentor because of the qualities you see and want. You then imitate these qualities, replacing all the negative ones since what you want is a positive change.
      Being yourself simply means not compromising your values for anything or anyone. You hold on to those values and qualities because you believe they will take you far. Any right-thinking person should know that overconfidence and bluntness are limiting.
      As for shyness, it’s just about overcoming the fear of communication. I used to be shy and you can still see the traces in me. If developing relationships is your goal, shyness can’t be welcome.
      I really appreciate your comment.

  4. Great post as always! I love the story about your family doctor and how cool that your dad appreciated him the way he did. That is a wonderful parental gift when kids grow up believing in themselves. So many of my patients grew up with shame complexes and not believing in themselves and the shame residuals lasted for years. May we as parents and grandparents always give our kids the gift of believing in themselves!

  5. Good post to remind us to stay true to who we want to be, not who we think the world wants us to be.

  6. Hi Lanre,
    Thanks for visiting my blog and leaving a comment. It’s nice to “meet” you here. I really enjoyed reading this article because it’s a mix of nostalgia, inspiration and common sense. I like the idea of both having and being a mentor. I always advocate that we can all learn from each other because we all bring our unique skills and experiences to the “table”.

  7. To your question in the last paragraph, my answer is yes.I’ve found myself ‘copy-cating’ someone and then, before I realize it, I lose touch with myself – the real me.

    It happens often and on, consciously and unconsciously, so, my advice is that we should know who we are. If I know who I am, I’ll be in the right position to draw back when I think I’m losing touch with myself.

    Also, it pays to be you, to stand out, to be different especially in a positive way.

    By the way, I love that pic. :-D

    *My little contribution*

    Regards,
    Chukwuka.

    • Hi there,
      Yes, if we know ourselves and what we have, we would always keep in contact with who we are and know when we are about to deviate. Thanks for your awesome comment.

  8. Hi Lanre,
    One thing that I will like to say is that “there can never be anyone like you” so it is an advantage for all of us to build on and use as an advantage over other.

    Thanks for sharing this

  9. The greatest favor that anyone do for themselves is to believe in themselves. The result for doing this is very great and this will show to the world that truly, you are a unique creature.

    Thanks for sharing

  10. Wonderful post Lanre… There is truly only one you and all you can really do is be the best you can be. People will relate to you and only you in some areas so never let anyone else take that from you.

    I know for a fact that I don’t relate to everyone I meet online and some people just explain things better than others. They may have shared the same ideas about content but you shared it in a way that I was able to not only understand but relate to you as well. That my friend is unique and special.

    I’ve never tried to copy anyone else but it wasn’t until I found my own voice that my blog really took off. That’s why I know for sure that by just being yourself, everything else will fall into place.

    Great post Lanre and thanks for sharing this. It’s a very important topic and I hope everyone reads this and “gets it”..

  11. Hi Adrienne,
    I’m glad you found this post interesting. It’s true, sometimes things don’t go our way until we come to terms with who we are. I hope my blog gets to the level that yours’ has.
    Thanks for checking my blog and I appreciate your comment.

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